Lindsay Lohan Is Probably Going to Die

Lindsay Lohan, shown above wasted and full of collagen, has apparently been drinking and using so many drugs that her friends are afraid she's going to kill herself. Cocaine, ecstasy, downers and booze--and that's just breakfast! Ah, I kid, I kid, but only a little bit. Like I said, friends worry that her out-of-control lifestyle will soon mean her death, but no mention is made of her family concerns. Her mother is probably busy prostrating herself at the feet of anybody who's ever been on TV. Including the people who stand outside The Today Show with signs proclaiming their love for Al Roker.

I hope for her sake that Lindsay can get her life together. I don't know if she's got any chance of a career after completely frying herself the way she's been, or if she's really even that good of an actress to begin with. I only ever saw her in Mean Girls, which was entertaining, but by no means a Lohan tour-de-force. But on just a human level, no matter how fun it is to make fun of her antics, if she's going to kill herself, there'd be nothing to make fun of anymore. So she should get her damn act together and clean up so I can have more fun talking shit about her.

Source: National Enquirer

Related Posts: Lindsay Lohan Does Cocaine, Nobody Is Surprised